素颜! 发表于 2021-3-14 10:25

有一种修养,叫知人不评人,知事不声张。说话之道固然重要,懂得闭嘴更为要紧!

<!----><style type="text/css">html{font-size:375%}</style><link href="https://pic.app.jiuquhe.com/static/publish/css/style.css?v=1605251010485" rel="stylesheet" position="1" data-qf-origin="/static/publish/css/style.css?v=1605251010485"><div class="preview_article ">            <!---->    <div class="main" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 48px;"><div class="text-box" style="padding-right: 0.3rem; padding-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.3rem; line-height: 1.5; overflow: hidden;"><div class="ueditor-edit-html" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 15.84px;"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: justify;"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.75; letter-spacing: 1px; color: #3e3e3e;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">有句古训说:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“知人不必言尽,言尽则无友;责人不必苛尽,苛尽则众远;敬人不必卑尽,卑尽则少骨。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">知人不言,能看破而不说破;&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">责人不苛,给别人留有余地;&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">敬人不卑,姿态要不卑不亢。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">做人做事,恰到好处,才能既让别人感到舒服,又让自己活得自在。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 10px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: center; position: static;"><section style="margin: 8px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; border: 1px solid #73a684; display: inline-block; transform: rotate(45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 4px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; transform: rotate(-45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; background-color: #eaa965; width: 1.6em; height: 1.6em; line-height: 1.6em; font-size: 19px; border-radius: 50%; color: #ffffff;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">01</p></section></section></section></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 1.75; letter-spacing: 1px; color: #3e3e3e;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><ul class=" list-paddingleft-2" style="margin-left: 0.12rem; padding-right: 0.3rem; padding-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; width: auto !important;"><li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">知人不言尽,知事不声张。</strong></p></li></ul></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">古人云:“多言多败。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">说话之道固然重要,懂得闭嘴更为要紧。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">《论语》中记载了一段对话。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">有人说:“冉雍这个人有仁德,可惜不善于言辩,没有口才。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">孔子不认同:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“何必要有口才呢?伶牙俐齿地和别人去争辩,常常会惹人讨厌。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">我虽不知道他到底算不算得上仁,但是为什么要有口才呢?”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">在孔子看来,善于言辩者未必就胜过不善言辞之人。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">很多时候,咄咄逼人的人反而更让人厌烦,更有甚者喜欢往别人的痛处上去说,还沾沾自喜地以为自己把别人看得一清二楚。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">殊不知,这只会让人对其敬而远之,不敢相交。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">毕竟,谁会愿意和戳自己痛处的人做朋友呢?</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">真正的聪明人,从来都是知人不评人,知事不声张,看破不说破。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">冯唐的《三十六大》中有个故事。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">台北一家茶馆中,几个朋友相约喝茶。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">茶馆主人当着他们的面,吹嘘自己在乡下承包了几亩茶地,种出的山地茶皆是极品,世所罕见。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">巧合的是,几位朋友中恰好有位从事茶业的老总,对茶非常有研究,一眼就看出茶馆主人其实是在吹牛,但他没有当即戳破,而是笑而不语。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">老总为人一向如此,对很多人、很多事,都是抱着看破不说破的态度,因而在生意场上游刃有余,与许多合作伙伴都保持着良好的关系。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">五台山金阁寺门口的一副对联上写道:“看破世事难睁眼,阅尽人情暗点头。”&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">人非圣贤,孰能无过,谁都有犯错出丑的时候,不要去做那个“火眼金睛”的聪明人,出一时的风头,让别人难堪。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">海明威说:“我们花了两年学会说话,却要花上六十年来学会闭嘴。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">能够看破固然是一种能力,选择闭嘴更是一种成熟。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">人生于世,不必处处出头,不用事事争先,不如收敛锋芒,点到为止。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">看破不说破,懂得给别人留面子,才是高情商的表现。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 10px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: center; position: static;"><section style="margin: 8px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; border: 1px solid #73a684; display: inline-block; transform: rotate(45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 4px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; transform: rotate(-45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; background-color: #eaa965; width: 1.6em; height: 1.6em; line-height: 1.6em; font-size: 19px; border-radius: 50%; color: #ffffff;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">02</p></section></section></section></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><ul class=" list-paddingleft-2" style="margin-left: 0.12rem; padding-right: 0.3rem; padding-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; width: auto !important;"><li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">责人不苛尽,得理要饶人。</strong></p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></li></ul></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">明代思想家吕坤在其著作《呻吟语》中写到:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“责人到闭口卷舌、面赤背汗,犹刺刺不已,岂不快心!然,浅隘、刻薄甚矣!故君子攻人,不得过七分,须含蓄以养人之愧,令其自新,则可。”&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">责备别人的时候,将对方逼到哑口无言、汗流浃背、面红耳赤、无地自容的地步,还滔滔不绝地持续指责;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">逞一时之快,却暴露了自己心胸狭隘、为人刻薄的品行。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">所以说,君子在指责他人的时候,要懂得给对方留下改过自新的余地。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">人人皆有可能犯错,不揪着别人的错处不放,给对方留有退路,方是智者所为。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">看过一个典故:&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">一座香火旺盛的古刹,被小偷惦记上了香火钱,甚至可能威胁到古刹中僧人们的安全。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">于是,就有僧人提出大家联合起来捉拿小偷,以绝后患。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">然而,主持不仅没有同意,反而还故意在夜里将门虚掩,以便小偷逃走。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">僧人们对此疑惑不解,甚至对主持有所怨言。在他们看来,主持此举无疑是在助长小偷的气焰。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">面对众人的诘问,主持这样回答:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“做人,别做绝了,要给人留后路。做贼的人,也是遇到了难处,才出此下策的。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">巧的是,这话正好被小偷听到了,他羞愧难当,又大为感动。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">在那之后,古刹里再也没丢过香火钱。从前丢的那些钱,也被偷偷地还了回来。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">老话说,凡事留一线,日后好相见。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">得理不饶人,站在道德的立场上并无错处;得理却饶人,却是给别人留下一条生路。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">郭德纲也告诫过我们:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“得饶人处且饶人,山不转水转,人生在世,谁都会有马高蹬短山穷水尽的时候,留一些余地,是给自己一些退路。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">今日犯错的是他人,明日落难的可能就是你。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">聪明人,都懂得凡事退三分,得理也饶人,给别人留下的余地,或许就是他日自己的生机。</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 10px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: center; position: static;"><section style="margin: 8px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; border: 1px solid #73a684; display: inline-block; transform: rotate(45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 4px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; transform: rotate(-45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; background-color: #eaa965; width: 1.6em; height: 1.6em; line-height: 1.6em; font-size: 19px; border-radius: 50%; color: #ffffff;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">03</p></section></section></section></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><ul class=" list-paddingleft-2" style="margin-left: 0.12rem; padding-right: 0.3rem; padding-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; width: auto !important;"><li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"><strong style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">敬人不卑尽,莫讨好他人。</strong></p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></li></ul></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">听过一句父亲教育儿子的话:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“在人之上,要把别人当人;在人之下,要把自己当人。”&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">甚觉有理。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">很多时候我们都是居于下位者,总会不自觉地过于高看他人,这其实是对自己的一种看低。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">有一年,著名主持人白岩松去广州暨南大发表演讲。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">学生们看到他,都激动非常,有要签名的,有求合影的,还有很多拍照发微博的。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">演讲开始后,白岩松先说了这样一段话:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“我刚才看到有一条微博,写着:就要见到白岩松老师了!!!!!!!!</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">用了八个感叹号!我非常替你可惜。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">当你拥有一个表达空间的时候,你却把权利用在感叹上,而不是提出你的问题。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">我想,如果今天的论坛要让我们拥有一点什么的话,那就从平视开始。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">不管别人处在怎样高的位置,都不该去仰视;不管别人处在怎样低的位置,都不该去俯视。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">习惯性仰视他人,习惯性放低自己,这其实是一种讨好型人格的体现。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">作家蒋方舟就曾是讨好型人格。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">优秀如她,内心其实很自卑,很敏感,总是下意识地去讨好别人,想尽各种办法照顾别人的情绪;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">甚至和男友吵架,都担心对方生气,次次都是自己低头道歉。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">那段时间,她活得很痛苦。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">而当她逐渐试着不去讨好任何人后,她才真正找回了自己。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">她终于明白:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“真正欣赏你的人,是欣赏你骄傲的样子,而不是你故作讨喜和故作谦卑的样子。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">我们其实常常将尊敬与讨好搞混,把敬人三分做成了卑躬屈膝,将尊重他人做成了惟命是从。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">其实,敬人的同时,不必委屈和放低自己。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">聪明人,敬人而不卑微,能低头也懂抬头,不卑不亢,活得自由。</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75; direction: ltr;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 10px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; text-align: center; position: static;"><section style="margin: 8px 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; border: 1px solid #73a684; display: inline-block; transform: rotate(45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 4px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; transform: rotate(-45deg);"><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; background-color: #eaa965; width: 1.6em; height: 1.6em; line-height: 1.6em; font-size: 19px; border-radius: 50%; color: #ffffff;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">042</p></section></section></section></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">余秋雨在《苏东坡突围》中写到:</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 10px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; color: #3e3e3e; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 1.75;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">“成熟是一种明亮而不刺眼的光辉,一种圆润而不逆耳的音响,一种不理会哄闹的微笑,一种洗刷了偏激的淡漠。”</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">聪明人,知道何时该进,何时该退,何时该坚持,何时该让步。&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">知人不言尽,有看破的聪明,也有不说破的智慧;&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">责人不苛尽,有宽阔的心胸,也有够长远的眼光;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">敬人不卑尽,有尊重的修养,也有不讨好的底气。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">人生海海,世事繁杂。</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">&nbsp;</p></section><section style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 13px;"><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">作者:丫丫</p><p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;">来源:有书</p></section></section></div></div><div class="read-share" style="margin-right: 0.3rem; margin-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; height: 0.42rem; color: #bbbbbb;"><span class="share-rt" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px 0.1rem 0px 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 0.42rem; font-size: 0.24rem; float: right;">&nbsp;<a style="margin: 0px 0px 0px 0.4rem; padding: 0px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; vertical-align: top;" data-target="Wxzone"><img style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; display: block; height: 0.42rem;" src="https://file.safetree.com.cn/appapicontent/news/images/share-qq.png" alt=""></a></span></div><div class="banner-box" style="margin-top: 0.5rem; margin-right: 0.3rem; margin-left: 0.3rem; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; border-radius: 0.1rem;"><div id="detail_ad" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box;"></div></div></div><div id="divTest" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: sans-serif; position: fixed; height: 40px; line-height: 40px; width: 360px; bottom: 0px; left: 0px; right: 0px; transform: translateY(50px); text-align: center; font-size: 0.32rem; opacity: 0;">上拉查看评</div>    <!----></div><!---->

农夫 发表于 2021-3-14 10:58

少说话多做事

晴转多云 发表于 2021-3-14 11:02

话不投机半句多

洗个锅 发表于 2021-3-14 11:04

关键时刻不要乱说话

随风飘过 发表于 2021-3-14 12:07

感谢分享,给你点赞!下次有这样的好内容,记得分享哦~

素颜! 发表于 2021-3-14 12:28

对

素颜! 发表于 2021-3-14 12:28

{:hemabishi:}

素颜! 发表于 2021-3-14 12:29

是最好的选择

森林里的木子萍 发表于 2021-3-14 13:03

说的对

半生浮云 发表于 2021-3-14 14:16

赞一个
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